The Initiate's World
by TrisandFour64xxx
Summary: Will Alexia ever discover who her true family are? With the help of her friends, some she's only just met and some she's known her whole life, Alexia might just do that. But with initiation going on at the same time, will she forget them? What she needs to realise, though, is that some memories and people aren't intended to be remembered.
1. Chapter 1

I never think of my brother. His absence haunts me through the dull, boring halls of our house. Our house is like everybody's else in Abnegation; we are forbidden to hand personal decorations because having a unique home is selfish. I don't even remember what my brother looks like. My father, Marcus, never mentions his name, so I don't know what it is. Every time I ask him about it, he either changes the subject or just says 'his absence is too painful to talk about'. Was it really that bad?

My father assumes that I'll be the child that stays. I know because I overheard him earlier saying to some people called Natalie and Andrew Prior: "I know she'll stay, she's always selfless. Alexia wouldn't do that to me. Alexia Grace Eaton is my last child and she knows it" The man, Andrew, replied with this: "I know you believe that, but look at what i thought about Beatrice and Caleb." The conversation continued but i got really bored so i went for a walk around the compound; it gave me time to clear my head. Who the hell were Beatrice and Caleb? Were they former Abnegation members like my brother? Guess I'll never know. Marcus wasn't ugly, but he wasn't the most handsome man you've ever met. He had gray, short hair, green and grey eyes. I liked the Abnegation compound. Barely anyone has cars so the air is really clean, the grass is always a perfect shade of green and everyone likes to just sit out in the sun and talk. Although sometimes I don't like the compound. All the buildings are the same, none of the kids are allowed to play or run around and all streets look the same so it takes you years to learn where your own house is.

Children, in long, gray slacks, sat on the grass talking about the weather and how each others' day had been. they were so lucky; they don't have to deal with all this insanity for at least seven more years. I have to wait two hours, and then I'll be gone. Out of this boring hell hole for good and i'll never come back. I don't care if I have to put up with impure air, I just don't care anymore.

Looking at my watch (the only jewellery we're allowed because it's practical) I realise that the bus will come by soon and I really need to get ready for the choosing ceremony. My tests the other day told me I was Erudite. What the hell? I hate learning about things. I actually fell asleep in my History of The Factions class, I woke up to a teacher yelling at me. Either way, I know what I'm going to pick: Candor. I'll always be honest when I can, just never around my father. He would whip me with his belt if I hurt anyone's feelings even a little bit. He says that being honest is being selfish. How that is true, I have no idea. Either way, I don't want to get whipped. I remember the aptitude test from yesterday so clearly. Me and about four other people all walked into different rooms. They would've been met by Abnegation members that have been so selfless and given up their time to perform these tests. I however, was met by a Dauntless tattooed freak (We can't be tested by our own faction members). She had dreadlocks like Bob Marley and her skin was more ink than flesh. "You have done this before, right?" I asked as I sat down in a chair that looked much like a dentists' chair. "Oh yes, for quite a few years now." She replied. She continued talking for quite a long while after that and I pretended to listen. Every so often, I'd add an "yeah" or a "ohhhh". Finally, she stopped talking and injected me with the serum. After that, all went black and I can't remember anything, even now. The serum erases all memories of what we saw and replaces them with patches of black, darkness.

As I turned the corner on to Yoxall Avenue (the road i live on), I heard screams of pain. I picked up the pace and started to jog round the corner. Before me I saw what looked like an eleven year old boy, with his leg twisted in an awkward position whilst his mother stood over him saying something to him. She had auburn hair that shimmered in the sun, but apart from that she was exactly the same as everyone else. Same shirt and the same long, grey slacks. I edged closer so that I could hear what the woman was saying, "Don't be so selfish! How dare you bring all this attention to yourself. I expected you to be better than this." She practically spat on him whilst he was in pain. I couldn't stand up for this. I wouldn't.

"Hey! Hey!" The woman turned and glared at me. Boi, if looks could kill! Up close, the woman wasn't as pretty as she seemed; she was older too. She had plain brown eyes with a nose that flicked at the end and a small scar curving down from the edge of her mouth.

"Yes?" She replied with a slightly lower pitch than most woman.

"You can't treat him like that, he's just a little kid! He doesn't underst-" I shouted

"He should respect our Faction." She replied in a low tone, cutting me off. "Shouldn't you be getting ready anyway?"

Oh God, I had six minutes before the bus would arrive. Damn it! That means after taking four minutes to get home and and explain to my father why I've been gone for ages, I only have two minutes to do my hair. My mother used to do it, but she died after having surgery, so I'm told. Running down the street, I turn quite a few heads but no one stops me. Normally, the Abnegation frown on creating such an attraction as they think that drawing attention to one person is selfish. Thank god that will be over soon.

Slamming through the wooden, front door, I run straight upstairs leaving my fathers' question lingering in the air. I bolt into the bathroom desperately trying to seize the hair brush and some bobby pins to tie my hair into a knot. Where was it? Aha!

"Alexia!" Marcus shouted up the stairs. "Alexia Eaton get down here! The bus is here!"

Damn it! Damn it! Damn it! I'll have to do my hair on the bumpy bus. Stumbling, I ran down the stairs.

"Are you going to answer my question from earlier?" Marcus asked.

"I went for a walk and then helped out this kid." It was kind of true at least.

"That's my girl, always being selfless" Proudness stood out pretty well in that sentence.

Guilt overwhelmed me. Why are you feeling guilty? This is an man who has beaten you many times. Get a grip girl! You're Alexia Eaton, you can do anything!

"Where is Megan? I assumed that she would be riding with us today." Marcus asked. Megan was my best friend and had been since i can remember. Her sister left abnegation two years ago to join Dauntless; Megan can't remember what she looks either because Megan was in a car crash a few months ago and forgot nearly everything. Megan has a car because her father, Andrew, has to drive to the Erudite compound and back everyday since he is a member of the Governing Council.

"Megan and her family went to set up the chairs, remember." I tried to sound polite but harshness edged my voice. If he noticed, he didn't mention it. We stood outside the house, waiting for the bus to come. This is the only time a bus comes down our road. I hope it will be late; it will give me more time to get my hair looking neater. The bus finally turned the corner, a little too late really.

After finally finding a seat on a bus filled with Abnegation and Amity (our compounds were right next to each other), I collapsed in it and closed my eyes. I didn't realise that I had drifted off until I heard Marcus ordering me to give up my seat to an Amity. Still half asleep, I stood up, giving the Amity person, who at least said thank you, my seat on the bus. When I stood up, Marcus, very subtly, slapped my back, as if to look like a pat, and whispered in my ear, "That's what you get when you embarrass me."

I stood for the rest of the trip, even though there were seats available, just incase I dozed off again and got another slap.

About fifteen minutes after we got on the bus, we came to a halt outside a massive building. It was quite plain but also quite creative, to me anyway. I suppose this is just a normal building to nearly everyone else. My father and I let everyone else off of the bus before us because we are selfless. Surrounding me were lots of tall, angled buildings in different shapes, painted different colours. However, there was one building that stood out the most. It had all the faction symbols on it: hands for Abnegation, a tree for Amity, scales for Candor, an eye for Erudite and flames for Dauntless. Soon, the scales will belong to me. Or shall I choose the flames? I can either choose what I really want or I can choose what I believe I will succeed the most in. In Candor, I'll be doing what I'm best at but in Dauntless, I'll be doing the thing I want to. I still have some time to think. Not long though.

Sixteen year olds from every faction gather at the entrance to the main building, inline with their faction symbol. Every faction arrives in a different way; Abnegation and Amity arrive by bus, Erudite arrive by vehicles they have designed, Candor arrive by walking because the building is in their compound and the Dauntless arrive by jumping off a train. "Attention! Attention!" called a middle aged woman, "You will now enter the building in alphabetical order." She started reading out name, after name, after name, and I had completely switched off until I heard "Alexia Eaton" which to my distaste, cause quite a commotion.

The unique building was even bigger and better inside. It had a massive arch filled with seats but separated into five different sections; one for each faction. Abnegation were on the far left, then so on in alphabetical order. Searching the crowd, I saw Marcus sitting there with a smile that reaches his eyes, something I haven't seen in at least six years, mouthing something along the lines of: "I'll see you at home". Instead of feeling guilty for my actions, I simply mouth this back to him: "Faction before blood". Shock and confusion flood his face, as the speech made by someone called Jeanine comes to a close and the first sixteen year old, an Amity boy, takes a knife off her, we properly start the ceremony. The first candidate to change factions is an Erudite girl who switched to Candor. This caused a little bit of murmurs but they had all died down by the time the next candidate came up. About five minutes later, I heard "Alexia Grace Eaton". Stumbling, I made my way to the bowls, giggles arose from behind me as I nearly face-planted into the floor. The bowls were all lined up in a loose semi-circle around me. Each bowl faced where that faction was sitting. It was annoying because you had to look at the other factions as you chose a different one. With a knife in my hand, I felt powerful, I felt strong, I felt Dauntless. With the blade pressed into my hand, I quickly flicked my wrist back and a sharp stinging sensation arose on my hand. The Candor and Dauntless bowls were next to each other. I only had a short time to make my decision. I stuck my hand out between them. Oh screw it, I hate wearing white, I thought and I jerked my hand to the right. That's when chaos broke out.

"She's like Tobias!" many people shouted, "She's followed in his footsteps!"

Tobias? Who was that? Was that my brother? Following in his footsteps, did my brother transfer to Dauntless too? Will I see him there? WIll I ever see him?

"Quiet, quiet, quiet!" Jeanine shouted into a microphone. After a few more minutes of insanity, everyone seemed to quieten down. Everybody but the Dauntless were involved in that cat fight; they just sat there and looked smug. As I walked off towards my future faction, I couldn't help but glance at Marcus out of the corner of my eye and the moment I did, I regretted it. Pain and anger engulfed his face and he glared at me with complete hatred. Natalie Prior stood next to him and comforted him by patting his arm whilst giving me a friendly smile.

Standing behind the Dauntless felt like home. It felt like I had finally found where I belong. The rest of the ceremony went in a blurr. I was switched off for most of it, thinking of Tobias. The only bit that stood out was Megan making her decision: Dauntless. She looked up at me and smiled whilst making her way towards me. This also caused a little bit of commotion but not nearly enough compared to me. People whispered this time as well but they whispered this: She's like Beatrice! Was that Megan's sister? I had to find out.

When Jeanine gave the last speech about seeing everyone next year, the Dauntless erupted into cheers and yells and started running out of the hall. I kept up with everyone pretty well; I've always been naturally fast. I might not be the strongest or the bravest of the initiates but I was definitely one of the fastest. I'm really glad I watched the Dauntless jumping on and off trains when I was younger. So when someone shouted "We're jumping on!" I knew what to do. Run five feet, throw out left hand, grab handle, swing legs round and pull self in. It was quite an easy process, once you knew the ropes. After getting in myself, I crouched by the door to the car and helped pull in other initiates. Two initiates were too slow to make it. They just failed the first test. They're factionless now.

Once everyone was in, I went and sat at the back of the car next to one Candor, one Erudite and Megan

"Hi, I'm Natasha but you can call me Tasha. You're the Alexia Eaton right? You caused quite a commotion back there in the hall! I'm sorry, I'm Candor, am I being rude? I'm so used to telling the truth all the time." She explained, she seemed pretty nice, a little hyper, definitely a Candor though.

"Umm, yeah hi, you can call me Lexi and don't worry about being honest, i'd just watch it in front of our leaders" I replied. Tasha was pretty, she had straight, long, blonde hair with streaks of pink in it. She had deep brown eyes and a thin nose.

"Oh hey Alexia, I am so glad me and you chose the same faction! I was scared everyone here would hate me but now I have you! " said Megan. She too was pretty. She had curly, light, brown hair and freckles on her pale face to match the emerald blue eyes she had. The last girl was Olivia. She was lost in her own little world of knowledge so Tasha told me all about her instead because apparently they were best friends growing up and knew everything about each other. Olivia's really pretty too. She had slightly frizzy, brown hair that came down to her shoulders and she also had dark brown eyes.

I sat there for a while wondering about what Dauntless Initiation was going to be like. I was interrupted from my daze when someone shouted "They're jumping off" Jumping off? On to what? As we came closer, the answer became clearer: a roof. Simple. Tasha was squealing at Megan something about jumping together. The train started to slow down a little bit, but it was still moving pretty fast. Closer, closer, closer. Jump! Flying through the air, I felt adrenaline pumping through my veins. I was made to be brave. I was made to be Dauntless.

I landed on my feet on the roof whilst Megan, Tasha and Olivia seemed to be tumbling all over the place. Not the best way to start. We went to join the rest of the group after brushing ourselves off and found ourselves standing at the edge of the roof looking into a big, black hole.

"This is your first test," called out one of the leaders, I think his name is Eric (he said it earlier but I wasn't listening) "If you can jump down, you can proceed. Any questions?"

"Is there a net at the bottom or water or something like that?" asked an initiate curiously.

"You'll have to wait and see," replied Eric, "So, who's going first?" An awkward silence hung in the atmosphere. No one wants to be the first to jump, it would just be embarrassing. What's more embarrassing though, is when your friends (I guess) step back in unison and push you forward so you look like a volunteer.

"Well isn't history repeating itself! I see we have a volunteer. What's your name Stiff?" asked Eric with a hint of mock in his voice.

"Lexi." I whispered

"What was that, Stiff?" asked Eric.

"Lexi." I replied, louder this time.

"Well good luck then." I swear there was a hint of sarcasm in that voice. Standing on the edge of the roof, reality started to set in. This is really happening, I'm actually going to jump off a roof and on to what exactly, I had no idea. Howling, the wind rushed past me, knocking me off balance. Carefully, I regained my balance. Calm down. Jump in three...two...

"That's long enough."Said Eric as he pushed me off the roof. I tried to scream but nothing come out. I felt like I was falling for hours. As I looked up, I saw Eric smirking at me. God, I hated him. Finally, my back hit something hard, but it wasn't the concrete I half expected. No, it was a net. It wrapped around me like a cocoon. Two pairs of hands grabbed out to reach me. I grabbed the closest pair which belonged to a woman just a couple of years older than me. She's really pretty; she has golden, long hair with brown eyes, lots of muscle and a tattoo down her collarbone of three crows. The other pair of hands belonged to a man about two years older than the woman. He was insanely handsome. He had loads of muscle, a tattoo peeking out from underneath the neck of his shirt, short, brown hair and deep brown hair. They both wore black fighting clothes that fit them quite tightly.

"Looks like history is repeating itself! Huh, Six?" asked the man.

"Guess it is, Four." replied the woman.

"Why does everyone keep saying that? What do you mean history is repeating itself?" I asked curiously.

"Wow a curious Stiff, she really is a mini you, Six. Oh, I'm Four by the way and we're two of your instructors." said Four.

"You guys have numbers as your names?" I asked with a hint of sarcasm in my voice.

"Well you're a bit rude aren't you? Where'd you get that from, huh?" questioned Six.

"My brother. By the way, I'm Lexi and I'm not a Stiff, I'm Dauntless." I replied.

"We'll see about that." Jeez, he was a bit rude, "First jumper, Lexi." shouted up Four, to Eric, I think. Six lead me off to the side, away from the net and against a wall. Four and Six got ready to catch the next initiate to fall into the net. I looked around to try and see where I was, but there was very little light in this whole. Off to the right, I saw a narrow hallway that lead to some unknown place. Screams echoed as the last faller, Tasha hit the net.

Once we were all standing on solid ground, Four and Six announced themselves and that they were going to be out instructors for this process. After that, they lead us down the narrow corridor that only had light at certain intervals, so when it was completely dark, I was sure I was lost until I felt Olivia and Megan's arms link with mine. The gesture was unusual to me but they seemed pretty used to it, so i went along with it.

Everyone came to an abrupt halt as Six said, "This is where we split up. The boys will go with Four and the girls will go with me. We've changed the initiation process to make it fairer and give everyone a chance at making it into the top ten." explained Six.

"Wait, some of us will get cut?" said Tasha with anxiety rising in her throat.

"You chose us, now we have to choose you." said Four, he actually sounded bored, as if he's said it billions of other times. After he said that, everyone shut up. We were all to shocked to say anything.

Four led the boys off to the left and Six led us straight on. Where the tunnel ended, there was a massive open space. The only word to describe it was to call it a pit. However, the peace was disrupted by the sound of crashing water going at insane speeds. Six lead us closer and closer to the rushing water. I expected it to be a river but it was more of a chasm than anything.

"This is something my leader said to me when I first arrived here: 'There is a fine line between bravery and idiocy.' And believe me that line is like freshly frozen ice: thin as hell. If anyone tries to pull off a brave stunt by jumping in here, your life will be over in seconds. I've seen it happen; it happened to one of my friends when I was an initiate. His name was Al. Some people say his death was brave but it was stupid, hence the thin line." explained Six. As soon as she mentioned her friend and his death, her face was flooded with loads of emotions, like a kaleidoscope of memories: pain, sorrow, disbelief, I even think I saw a flash of anger. She led us away from the chasm after that and led us down yet another long, narrow hallway (how do people not get lost here?) but this one had lighting all the way down it, so I could actually see the end of it. This hallway was unlike the others; it had intervals every now and then that lead off to different rooms. THe room Six lead us to was the fifth room down and instead of blue lights, it had orange flames.

"This is where you'll be sleeping for the next couple of weeks so make yourselves comfortable and if you have any questions, just ask the Dauntless-born initiates, they'll know the answer. Don't forget, dinner's at seven in the dining room. Have fun! Oh and by the way, the boys will get here soon so I would try and get the best beds whilst you can. Bye!" Six waved goodbye and left, probably to go and find Four, you can so tell that they're going out.

"Hey Meg, do you want to share a bunk?" I asked. No way was I going to share it with some stranger!

"Yeah sure, bagsy bottom bunk!" That chick had way too much enthusiasm in her voice, all it is, is a bed.

"Cool, I wanted the top anyway." I replied in a bored tone. Tasha and Olivia were still arguing over who was going on the bottom because they both wanted the top. Tasha almost killed me when I suggested that they just sleep in different beds. "WHAT? No way am I sharing it with a stranger, plus it would have to be a boy because all the other girls are taken!" She had said, I thought that she might actually bite my head off. There wasn't much settling in to do when you had no items to store anywhere, so instead, we sat down and learnt things about everyone. There were six girls that were transfers so in total, there were twelve girls in total. The six transfers were: Me, Megan, Olivia, Tasha, Brooke and Shannon. Brooke was really pretty too, she could even make the boring black-and-white of Candor look good (and that was pretty hard!) She had long ginger hair, freckles on her face and green brown eyes. Shannon was pretty, just not as much, she had wavy, blonde hair just below her shoulders. Compared to everyone else, I felt ugly. I was tall and lanky with a long nose. My brother once said I had nice eyes though, so that's something. My hair is wavy and flicks out at the ends, that's why I always wear it up.

We sat there for a while chatting until we heard thuds and loud voices coming from the hall. Me and Olivia ran to the door and flung it open. It was just the boys, but why were they so loud? They were running towards us, covered in mud and slipping all over the place. I ran away from the door this time, dragging Olivia with me so that we don't get trampled by them. We ran and sat on beds a split second before the boys smashed through the door laughing so loud, it shook the floor. What I saw next was not what I expected. Four came in smothered head to toe in mud, laughing louder than anyone else.

"What the hell did you guys do?" shouted Megan, "Just so that you know, I am not cleaning this up!" Muddy water was all over the floor in puddles. I bet I'll end up cleaning this, someone has to afterall.

"I showed the boys what it's really like to be in Dauntless, so I made them do BMF," he wasn't going to elaborate but our confused expressions probably made him, "BMF is British Military Fitness, you do lots of difficult challenges like running through a lake, which is what we did today." I still didn't understand half of that and gathered by friends' faces, they didn't either. All I know is that they ran through a lake, that seemed like the most important piece of information Four gave us. Maybe my first impression of him was wrong; sometimes he seemed nice, others he seemed horrible. I'll figure it out later.

All the boys were having showers and Four walked away muttering some excuse about needing to talk to Six, so I went and fetched a mop from the janitorial closet. The janitorial closet was two hallways down from our room. It was close to all the instructors' rooms. I started to head back after fetching the mop when I heard voices.

"What's your big obsession about that Stiff?" asked a woman, it sounded like Six. Stiff, were they talking about me or Megan?

"She's different, okay. There's something different about her. She reminds me of you but…but… also of myself." explained a man. Four; you could tell by the roughness in his voice. I stayed close to the walls, trying to blend in so I won't be caught. There's no curfew in Dauntless, so I wouldn't be punished for that, but I would be punished for eavesdropping on a private conversation. They slowly started moving towards my direction and as they did, I started to move further back. Snap. As I moved backwards, keeping my eyes on them, I stepped on a twig and evidently snapped it. In unison, their heads snapped up and they started approaching me much quicker than before. Run, I told myself. It's the only option left. Turning, I ran as fast as I could back to the dorm. Thank god it was night, otherwise they would've been able to tell it was me in a split second, but the night kept my identity a secret. I could feel them running after me. I could feel their heavy breaths as we ran faster and faster. I couldn't run to the dorms; that would be too obvious plus it's a dead end. So I just kept running. I didn't know where I was going, how I'd lose Four and Six, how I'd get back or how I wouldn't get in trouble. There's lots of corners in the Dauntless compound so it's easy to lose people, and that would be the same case for me but the corners also slow you down and with them right on my tail, it would be impossible to lose them. After running down what felt like a billion corridors, I found myself running into the pit. Because of my speed and my ability to run long distance, I put a bit more of a distance between us. In the corner of my eye, I saw a small little corridor, barely lit at all. Bingo! The distance seemed to get bigger and bigger as I got closer and closer. Eventually, I got to the entrance. The corridor sloped down, going further and further into the earth. I ran down it., Once again, I heard the rushing water of the chasm. Oh, no, it's a dead end at the end of this corridor and Six and Four are coming. Just keep running, I told myself. A few seconds later, I found myself standing still, facing a big wall of rock with the chasm racing next to me. Over the roar of the chasm, I could just about hear a voice saying this, "Now, now, what do we have here?" That voice wasn't Four's, that voice wasn't Six's, it was Eric's. I am standing next to a chasm with Eric standing behind me. Oh crap.


	2. Chapter 2

I still hadn't turned around. I could just about hear more footsteps running down the tunnel we're in.

"What the hell is going on?" asked Four.

"We have a rebel on our hands, it seems." replied Eric

"Can this be quick, I want to have my dinner and it's nearly seven o'clock." said Six, she sounded irritated.

"Well who the hell is it then?" asked Four. This time, his voice sounded sardonic. He started moving towards me, I could tell it was him because of the way he stomps his feet when he walks. If he were on a pontoon, he would sound like a herd of elephants. His hand clamped down on my shoulder and twisted me round. His face was full of contrasting emotions, confusion, anger, curiosity and loads more but those were the three that stood out the most. He stared into my eyes. It was a challenge. Looking away would show I was weak and willing to surrender, but staring him back would show I was strong and looking for a fight. Dogs do the same.

"The Stiff? Really?" questioned Eric. I should definitely be insulted by the amount of shock in his voice.

"What the hell were you doing?" said Four. It sounded more like a threat than a question.

"Ummmm…" I replied. Come on, quick lie, quick lie anything. Just say something!

"Well?"

"Uhhh, I was getting a mop then you guys started running after me but at the time I had no idea who it was so I started running." Well at least the first part was true.

"Why?"

"Well, when strangers start running at you, you tend to start running too."

"I meant, why were you getting a mop?"

"Oh, well when you guys came in, you spilled water everywhere and someone had to clean it up." Was he really that stupid to not guess that?

"Story seems true to me, you can go." replied Four. Will I ever get my opinion right? One minute he's nice, the next he a complete asswhole. I gave him a friendly smile and started walking towards the exit. As I walked past Eric, he grabbed the collar of my shirt and threw me over the edge of the chasm. A gasp escaped my mouth as I tried to catch my breath. I'm going to die.

"That was a very entertaining lie little Stiff, why don't you tell us what you were really doing. If you lie again, I will drop you" said Eric. He's actually going to kill me. Is this how Six's friend was killed, hung over the chasm by Eric?

"What the hell are you doing?!" shouted Four.

"I'm doing the right thing." replied Eric.

"The right thing! You are hanging an initiate over a chasm and threatening to kill her. Who cares if she's lying? Who cares if she overheard anything from our conversation? Just let her go, Eric."

said Four, his voice was very cautious. I thought about trying to squirm out of Eric's grip, but then I'd just fall into the chasm, there was no way that I was going to survive.

"You said it." Eric replied as he dropped me lower down. He let go of my shirt completely and was just holding me by my hair. The pain was excruciating; it felt like my hair was being sucked up by the world's most powerful vacuum.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh!" I screamed out in pain.

"No!" shouted Four. Spots appeared around the edge of my vision and everything started to get darker, until eventually, everything went black. The last thing I remember hearing was Four shouting this: " Give her to me! Now! It's either her or me."

I didn't wake up in the world of the dead. No, I woke up in a room that looked similar to the dorms but smaller and only one double bed, which I was in. It was very comfortable and much softer than the dorm beds. I liked it here. But where exactly is here? I tried to sit up to get a better look of the place when I heard a voice.

"Hey, hey, hey," said Four as he rushed over to help me, "you okay?"

"You saved my life, I feeling a bit better that okay." I said as I gave him a friendly smile. "Why did you do it?"

"Because I love you, not in that way but in a brotherly way." he said and just sat there staring at me.

"Wait… what!?" I asked, my voice shaking.

"Your last name is Eaton right?" he asked. I nodded, unable to say anything. "Well I'm … Tobias… Eaton. I'm your brother." he said nervously. I didn't say anything; I couldn't. All I could do was lean over to him and give him a massive hug. The gesture was strange to me but he seemed well rehearsed. I couldn't help letting a tear escape my eye and fall down my cheek. I found him! I've actually met my brother! As that thought swirled round my mind, more tears escaped from my eyes. When we pulled away, he looked at me and wiped away my tears with his hand. He patted my arm and winced.

"You okay?" I tried to nod but the pain in my arm flared more than ever. Four realised this and lifted up my sleeve to where the pain was strongest. As he saw it, he gasped. "Did dad do this to you?" he asked as he stared at the gash on my arm, just below my left shoulder.

"Yeah, couple days before I came here. I can't fail initiation; he said if I fail and become factionless, he'll make sure I go back to him. I can't do that Tobias, I can't go through anymore pain." Tobias nodded, he understood. He left because of Marcus.

"I sorry Lexi, I should've stayed and made sure he didn't hurt you anym-" he said

"I'm glad you left. Do you know why? Because my brother, the man who had already protected me for years beforehand, got to live the life he wanted. A life where he was safe, well as safe as Dauntless life is, and away from the man who made his life hell. Do I wish that you'd stayed? Yeah I do, but only because you're my brother and I love you." I explained to him as I leant my head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around my waist as I wrapped mine around his. We sat like that for a while, until someone came in.

"Hey Tobias -" said Six, "Oh, sorry! Am I interrupting something?" She sounded quite angry.

"Relax Tris. It isn't like that," Tobias explained, "Tris, as you know, this is Lexi… my sister"

"What is it with you and people like me huh? You can tell that you guys are related, you have the same coloured hair and eyes. But Tobias has more of Evelyn in him and you have more Marcus in you." She said. I never realised how nice she really was.

"Just a few things to point out. One, your name is Tris? As in Beatrice, as in Natalie and Andrew's daughter? Two, I take it that Evelyn is my mom? Three, when did you meet her? And four, where is she now?" I asked.

"Wow, that's a lot of questions! ummm… okay, one, yes, I am Beatrice slash Tris, but don't tell anyone, no one is supposed to know. Two, yes Evelyn is your mom. Three, I, well we, met her last year. And four… Tobias should I tell her?" Tobias nods, "Evelyn died last year. She tried to jump off the train and landed on her neck, I'm sorry." she said as she went over to Tobias to comfort him. You could tell thinking of Evelyn caused him emotional pain. Did he witness it? Was our mother a better person that our father? Tobias stood up and marched out of the room. I started to go after him when Tris said, "Give him a bit of space, he'll be alright after a while. By the way, and not to sound rude, but what is it to you if I'm Beatrice Prior?" she asked, the question itself was rude, but the way she delivered it made it sound like a friendly question.

"I'm best friends with your sister." I said, quieting my voice as I came to the end of the sentence. I was scared to look at her, I don't know why. A long awkward silence filled the atmosphere until Tris finally said, "Is she okay?" she asked, when she realised that the question confused me, she added, "You know, after the crash."

"Yeah she's good, she forgot what you look like, that's why she hasn't said anything." I say, defending Megan for why she wasn't speaking to Tris.

"I remember. I was allowed to go and see her. When I walked in, she had no idea who I was. She said 'who are you?'. Hearing her say that killed me so to save her anymore pain I simply said 'I'm a nurse'. She looked so fragile, damaged almost. I didn't want to put too much stress on her so I did what I thought would be best for her. God I regret it. I would do anything to have my sister back, for her to be like her old self. The person I saw in training was not the sister I once knew." Tears escaped her eyes. I had never felt so sorry for anyone before. I understood, I don't know how but I did.

"I understand. You did what you thought was right and you're probably right, telling her then would've put too much pressure and stress on her. But what about telling her now?" I suggest.

"No! Not yet anyway. Give it some time. Promise me, okay. You have to promise that you won't tell her. Not in training, not at lunch, not in initiation, never!" she said to me in a dangerous tone.

"I promise." was all I said. Then something clicked. Initiation? "Damn it! Initiation! What time is it? Eric is going to kill me so much. I'm going to be so late!" I said hyperventilating. Tris looked at me, amused. Why was she amused? She was going to be late too.

"Relax! It's Saturday. We give the initiates the day off on Saturdays. And do me a favor, don't joke about Eric killing you, we've already been down that road, I don't intend to go down it again. Oh and I found these on the chair over there, I'm assuming they're yours since they wouldn't fit me or Tobias."

she said. I'd rather not go down the 'Eric' road again either, to be honest. She went out of the room whilst I changed into my new Dauntless clothes. They were all black and tight but flexible enough for fighting. Once I finished dressing, I called Tris and said it was okay to come in. I thought about what Tris said about Eric and once I thought about Eric, my mind immediately thought about Tobias. Where was he? Should I go look for him?

"You want to go after Tobias don't you? He'll probably be near the chasm, he likes it round there, well he used to anyway. So if you were gonna start somewhere, I'd start there." she explained.

"Thanks." I said and stood up. I caused spots to float in from the corner of my vision, but it didn't stop me from going; neither did the massive headache that suddenly overwhelmed me. I couldn't walk very fast, as my limbs were pretty sore, but I could still walk. I still had no idea what the time was but the sun was shining low on the east horizon so it was definitely morning. As I walked past the dorm, I looked in and saw that everyone was still sleeping, it was early then. I wonder if they know that we have Saturdays off. I kept walking towards the Pit. I took this time to think, to think without anyone influencing my opinions. I thought about what was coming up soon. Visiting day. The day all initiates dread. Will our parents come or will they be too broken and too full of hatred to come. Marcus would never come in his life. He'd rather die than visit the daughter that embarrassed him in front of hundreds of people. Another reason why he wouldn't visit is Tobias. He wouldn't want to face Tobias after everything that happened with them. Marcus abused Tobias more than me, I always felt guilty when I heard him cry out in pain. Tobias got abused more than me because he took my beatings for me. I was only about three when Marcus started abusing me and Tobias would always stand up for me and take my beatings.

I arrived at the Pit in a daze and it wasn't till I heard the laughter of children that I snapped out of it. I followed the booming sound of rushing water. As I slowly got closer and closer, and the water got louder and louder, I realised how much I belong here. I belong here as much as my brother does. I meant what I said when Tobias and Tris helped me out of the net: I'm not a Stiff, I'm Dauntless. I don't care what anyone says, I don't care if they think I'm weak, I don't care if they think I'm fragile, I don't care about anything they say; the only opinion that matters is my own. Out of the corner of my eye, I see a shadowed figure move down the corridor that we were in last night. I can tell by the way he walks, hunched over and hands in pockets, that it's Tobias. I follow him down the corridor, trying not to make much noise.

"I didn't think you'd want to be down here again." he said

"I could say the same to you. I'm sorry about Evelyn. I wish that there was some way for me to help." I said, trying to sound sincere. In a way, I'm glad I never really met Evelyn because I'm don't have to go through the pain that Tobias is.

"I know and I love you for it, but you didn't know her like I did. I mean, yeah she was a really crap parent for leaving us with Marcus but she didn't know he was doing that to us. Then seeing her die right in front of me, it just… I don't even feel that sad that she died." that's when he broke down. Thousands of tears escaped his eyes as he collapsed on me and wrapped his arms around me. I didn't know what to do so I wrapped my arms around him too.

"It's okay, it's okay, you'll be alright, you're going to be fine." I said. I lower my voice and whisper in his ear, "I love you. Always remember that."

"I love you too, so much. I'm so glad I have you back. I'm going to ruin the moment by saying this but do you want to go and get some breakfast? All the other initiates will be getting up any minute now, anyway." Tobias says. He did kind of ruin the moment but he was right, I did want some breakfast and the other initiates will be getting up and it would probably look weird considering i'm hugging our instructor. We broke apart then and he wiped the tears away from his eyes as I wiped away mine.

"Does it look like I've been crying?" I asked. I didn't want to walk in to the dinner hall looking like I've been crying for ages. Everyone would ask what was wrong and when it comes to lies like that, I absolutely suck at telling them.

"No Lexi, you look as tough as nails." he says laughing.

"What?" I ask, confused.

"That's the same thing I told to Tris after she had been crying one time." he explains, smiling at the old memories, "You haven't been into the dinner hall yet have you?"

"No I haven't. I'm intrigued to see what it's like." I was too nervous to go to lunch yesterday, so I skipped that and obviously I was passed out from yesterday because of Eric, so this is the first time I'll be going in to the dinner hall.

Whilst we walked towards the dinner hall, I asked him why him and Tris were the only ones to get numbers as their nicknames and why they want us to call them that. He responded with this:

"Well we have the numbers as are nicknames because that's how many fears we have. Me and Tris have the lowest ever recorded fears; she has six and I have four. We make people call us by those names because we have quite shady pasts and people would instantly recognise us by our names. For example, if I told you from the start that I was called Tobias, other people would realise that I was Tobias Eaton and the same for Tris. So in a way, these nicknames protect us." A few seconds after he finished explaining, we arrived at the dinner hall. We must have been slightly early since no one but a couple of instructors were in there. A strange noise came from the dinner hall. It was like a really fast, good poem.

"What is that?" I ask curiously.

"Oh of course, you've never heard it have you? It's called music. Each faction, apart from Abnegation, have things called theme tunes and every faction has two of them and they originate in Amity. The two Dauntless theme tunes are: 'Burn' by someone called Ellie Goulding, some Amity person and 'Stronger' by another Amity person called Kelly Clarkson. Amity's theme tunes are 'Happy' and 'Light up the world'. Candor's are 'Get it right' and 'Anything could happen'. And Erudite's are 'Roots before branches' and 'The scientist'. I have no idea what the others sound like, I only know ours, and ours are pretty awesome! Listen, this is 'Burn', this one is my favourite." He says. He had a bit too much enthusiasm over some music, but i will admit that it was really catchy.

We sat down at a table with the other instructors. Tobias introduced me and life carried on as normal. As I sat there talking to Tobias, everything seemed normal and I forgot everything that was killing me on the inside. I forgot that I never met my mother, I forgot that my best friend is related to my brothers girlfriend, I forgot that visiting day is just around the corner. I was happy. Initiates started to scramble in about twenty minutes later. I saw Meg and Tash and Olivia skip in with high moods, did they miss me at all? I looked at Tobias and mouthed, 'Do I tell her the truth?' and he responded with a simple nod. I stood up, patted his shoulder and started towards Meg. When she saw me coming, she ran towards me and put me in a massive bear hug.

"Where the hell have you been?!" she asked and, in a way, it sounded like she was scolding me.

"Ummm… Come on, I'll tell you out here," I say as I lead them out of the dinner hall and into a long, lonely corridor. I told them the whole story from Eric hanging me over the chasm to Tobias and Tris (but I didn't tell them their real names) letting me stay in their room to me eating breakfast with Tobias.

"Eric really did that to you? Bastard!" shouts Megan, thank god no one was walking down the corridor then.

"Forget that! You're related to Four?!" exclaims Tasha

"Really not focusing on the main thing here, Tasha!" says Megan dramatically. We continued to talk about how Eric threatened me and how Four and Six came to the rescue for a while after that.

About ten minutes later, we decided that we were really hungry so we went into the dinner hall for breakfast. We sat at a rounded table in the middle of the room and as I sit there eating my toast absent mindedly, I couldn't help but let my eyes skim the room. I didn't know what I was looking for but there was something. Then I saw him. One of the initiates, one I thought was cute the instant I saw him, was staring at me. His name is Tyler and he's from Amity. He has both boyish and manly features to him which make him look so cute! He has short, blonde, spikey hair and piercing blue eyes. He was the most soaked initiate after the boys and Four did that British Military thingy. He was also the one who was laughing the most, next to Four. I saw him on the train and then, he didn't look as cute as he does now. Maybe it was because he was wearing his Amity clothes then. Now, we all wear Dauntless clothes. Now we all match.

"Is Tyler staring at you?" Said Livvie, sounding a bit jealous. I don't blame her; I'm not the prettiest out of all the initiates. Infact, if there was a list of the prettiest girls in Dauntless, I'd be pretty near the bottom. If there was a list for the boys, Tyler would be in the top three at least.

I wasn't quite sure what to do; no boy had ever noticed me, never mind like me. I smiled back at him, hopefully in a friendly way, then turned back to my friends as he turned back to his. Out of the corner of my eye, I swear I saw Tobias looking from Tyler to me. He better not go all big-brotherly on me.

Once breakfast was over, no one knew what to do really. I didn't get days off in Abnegation, and by the look on my friend's faces, they didn't in their old faction either. We stood in the middle of the Pit looking at each other, hoping someone would come up with an idea. I was only with Megan, Tasha, Livvie and Brooke. I'm glad someone shouted my name because it allowed me to escape the awkward silence of our conversation.

"Hey" Hey Lexi!" shouts Tyler as he runs over to me, "Hey, we're gonna have a party tonight. It's gonna be all the initiates and four of our instructors."

"Wait. Four of the instructors? We've only met three of them." I say, cutting him off.

"Yeah it's gonna be Four, Six, a girl called Christina and a dude called Uriah. They sound pretty safe. So are you guys in?" asks Tyler

"Ummm, well I'm definitely in. I'll ask the others," I say as I shout, "Hey guys, you wanna go to a party tonight?" they reply with thumbs up and nods. "We're in!" I say to Tyler enthusiastically.

"Great, see you tonight! Nine o'clock sharp!" he shouts over his shoulder.

I run back to the group and say, "I've got a few ideas of what we can do."

"Well go on then!" says Brooke in the same tone as me.

"One, we can get tattoos. Two, we can dye our hair or three, we can go shopping for tonight."

I let those ideas settle in, then Brooke erupts: "Okay … One, are you frickin kidding me! Two, are you frickin kidding me and three, that I can do."

"Anyone want to get a tattoo with me?" I ask

"I'd rather not scar my skin quite so early, thanks for the invite though." says Megan. A born Abnegation member.

So I try to stare Tasha out, "Ummm … Oh fine!" she says as she exhales.

"Yes!" I exclaim. "Okay, Brooke and Meg, you guys go and get us some clothes for tonight whilst me and Tash go and get a tattoo then dye our hair."

"Wait, dye our-"

"Bye!" I shout as I drag Tasha away from the others and towards the tattoo parlour.

"We're dying our hair? I did not sign up for that!" she complains

"Too bad, we're gonna go it anyway!" I reply. When she glares at me I say, "Come on, think how cool we'll look coming in to that party with tattoos and dyed hair."

We walked up the stairs of the tattoo parlour that were stupidly steep so at the top, It felt like my legs were going to fall off.

I was much bigger than I expected on the inside. There were four chairs, only one of them occupied at the moment, but only three tattooists visible. The other one must be in the back. One of them, a young woman, looks up and says, "You guys want one?" it was clear that she meant tattoos.

"Yeah but I don't know what to get." I say looking through all the designs. There were so many to choose from.

"I did the tattoos on two of your instructors so I can give you some ideas, if you want."

"That would be awesome, yes please!" I say desperately.

"Well Six has three tattoos: she has three crows on her collarbone, an Abnegation symbol on her left shoulder and a Dauntless symbol on her right shoulder. Four has all five symbols down his spine with loads of other things going on around it."

"Those ideas are awesome, but I want to get something more meaningful to me." I say trying to get an idea.

"Okay, I know what I want, number fifty-seven." says Tasha looking in a book full of designs.

"A lily? Why?" I ask looking at where she is pointing.

"My mother is called Lily. This way, I'll always have a piece of her with me without anyone knowing what it really means." she explains. It's a really good idea actually and I would do the same . . . if I liked my parents.

Tasha went and sat in the chair as the woman got all the ink ready.

"Good luck! Oh, and don't scream whatever you do!" I say. She sticks her tongue out at me and give me a gesture I happily return to her. The tattooist came back then and cleans her shoulder with some water and starts sketching lightly on her arm before using the needle to permanently draw it on. I thought of what I wanted then. I remember a quote from the song in the dining hall and it stuck with me: "And we gonna let it burn".

I don't know why I loved that one sentence so much. Maybe it was because it was the most Dauntless related quote in the whole song. It might also be because I've always wanted to be free. Free from everything; Marcus, my dead mom, Abnegation.

Tasha was done about five minutes later and her tattoo looked amazing. It was a beautiful half open, half closed pink lily.

"Tash that's awesome! It's so pretty!" I say staring at the fine details.

"Thanks. I love it too! You did a really good job, thank you Maggie." says Tasha. She looked like she was going to cry. Then it clicked.

"Wait … Maggie? Ohhhh you're the woman that did my Aptitude test aren't you?" It came out more of a question than a statement.

"Yes that'll be me. Have you decided what you want?" she asks, changing the subject.

"Yeah I'd like a quote on the left side of my collarbone: 'You can't move on with the next chapter of your life if you keep rereading the last one.'" I say.

"Alright then. Come and sit down," says Maggie, "I'll go clean the needle."

When she returned, she cleaned my collarbone with the water stuff and lightly sketched out the size and shape of all the letters. Five minutes later she finished the sketch and held up the mirror. "Do you like it? I can change the font or the size, if you like." she says.

"No, it's perfect. Thank you." I reply. I close my eyes as the needle scars my arm forever. It hurts but it's just a small stinging sensation. I must've dozed off because the next thing I remember is Maggie waking me up saying "It's done." then covered it up with a bandage then gave me instructions to keep it sealed for at least ten hours. Perfect timing for tonight because in ten hours, it will be coming up to party time!

"Oh my God Lexi! It's so pretty! I love it!" says Tasha squealing.

"I love it too!" I quote, mocking her voice, laughing. She laughed too. We said thank you to Maggie then waved her goodbye as we headed to the shops to try and meet up with the others and also buy some hair dye. We asked a few Dauntless-born initiates where the shops were and they directed us down a series of corridors. After swearing we were lost, Tasha saw a luminous sign reading 'Shop Here!'. I was expecting it to say something like 'shop here or we'll throw you over the chasm rainings!' seemed like a Dauntless thing to do.

The shop was much bigger on the inside than the outside. All clothes they sold were black. They sold a little bit of jewellery but it was either red, black, skulls or studs.

It took us about ten minutes to get past the swarm of blackness to find the hair dye. There was a massive variety of hair colours to choose from, blue, red, black, hot pink, green, even yellow. Not blonde, yellow! Not only was there loads of different colours, there was loads of shades of each colour! Me and Tasha debated what colours to choose for about fifteen minutes. We debated between black and red for what seems like hours. Tasha came up with a cool idea: red all the down, but at the end, dip dye it black. I had no idea what dip dying was, but the name made it quite obvious. Tasha decided to go with chocolate brown and hot pink. She was going to do the same as me but with different colours; brown all the way down, but then dip dyed hot pink.

When we got back to the dorm, we heard everyone's voice.

"Hey guys. Where were you? we looked all through the shop for you." I say. A small lie was mixed in there; we didn't look everywhere for them. The room remained silent.

"Umm . . . well . . ." Says Brooke, "We just think that you're throwing yourself into Dauntless life really quickly, that's all." It doesn't take a Candor to tell that she's lying.

"Now why don't you tell her the real truth." Says one of the Dauntless born initiates, Alice, in a mocking tone.

"The truth?" I ask

"We think that initiation is unfair," blurted out Shannon.

"Unfair?" I question. What could be unfair about initiation? We're all doing the same thing.

"Because you are related to one of the instructors, we think that might boost your score and make you get into the top ten." Says Brooke. Trying to sound kind. Then I snapped.

"Me getting into the top ten will have nothing to do with my relation to Four. It will be because I am born Dauntless. I just got a tattoo and I'm going to dye my hair. You guys are too scared to do things like that. Do you know why you're too scared? Because you're not Dauntless. Simple as that. Come on Tash.

Tasha hesitates a little bit but then comes glaring at the others.

"I can't believe you guys. We thought you were our friends." She says, disappointment and pain in her voice.

"No. Tash, you can tell that you're still friends with them. Just go." I say. I don't need the people I trust the most to be letting me down either. Tasha stood there as I walked away from the people I once called friends.

I half walked, half jogged to the corridor I always seemed to go to when I'm upset. I don't know why I like it so much there. I guess its because its quite secluded and almost desolate at times. Footsteps echo down the corridor as people walk past the entrance. I try to blend into the wall so no one will see me. I miss home. I actually miss home! What was wrong with me? That's when I broke down. I couldn't help it; the tears were like a tsunami in my eyes. Every painful moment since I got to Dauntless flooded my memory.

Another set of footsteps echoed down the corridor, but this set didn't walk past. No, it was coming directly towards me.

"Thought I might find you here," says Tyler sitting down next to me.

"Why were you looking for me?" I ask suspiciously, raising an eyebrow.

"Well I heard that you had ran off and none of your friends had come to find you, so I did," He can tell I don't believe him so he looks at me and adds, "and . . . Well . . . I kind of like you. You know, like, like you." He gives me an awkward smile and blushes as if what he said embarrassed him.

"My friends all guessed that. We all think you're crazy though, for liking me," I admitted.

It went silent then. Not in an awkward type of silence, but in a sweet, romantic type.

We sat there laughing for a while and all my worries went away. After a few minutes of chatting, Tyler put his arm around me and everything felt good.


	3. Chapter 3

We laughed and chatted for what seemed like an eternity. Tyler turned to stare at me. He started to lean in and I did too. We were lost in our own little world, so when footsteps started coming towards us, we never even noticed.

"Lexi, a word." Says a rough voice. Tobias. Could he pick a better time to interrupt!?

"See you in a bit." I say to Tyler, waving. He was getting up, brushing himself off and waving back. Tobias led me round the corner, on to, yet another, desolate hallway. Where was he going? Just then, he stopped.

"What's going on?" he asks, raising an eyebrow.

"Well . . . ummm . . . it's . . . you know . . . I . . ."

"Oh my god, Lexi just spit it out!" he interrupts.

"We're sort of dating," I say, lowering my voice near the end of the sentence. Tobias said nothing for a while so I started getting anxious.

"Okay," was all he said, "Okay, I'll have a chat to him later."

"Oh god no, please no!" I plead, "He'll hate me like everyone else!" I accidentally blurt out.

"Everyone hates you?" asks Tobias, "Why?"

"Megan and Tasha and that lot think that my score will be boosted because of my relation to you." I explain.

"No one hurts my sister," he says harshly, walking in the direction of the dorms.

"Hey," Tyler whispers, wrapping his arms around me and placing his head on my shoulder. "Why didn't you tell me?" he asked.

"I didn't want you to hate me like everyone else does." I whisper.

"I would never hate you." he says. Tyler turns me around to face him. Then before I can even understand what's happening, he kisses me. It's only short but it's really sweet and heartfelt. He pulls back and we both laugh. I hugged him goodbye, then left to go back to the dorm. It was close to midday so I would be heading to lunch soon. I don't know who to sit with though. Tyler and his friends or Megan and her friends. I'll decide it when the time comes.

Walking into the dorm, I realised that Megan, Brooke, Shannon, Livvie and Tasha were missing.

"Hey, do you know where Megan and them lot went?" I ask a Dauntless born initiate.

"Four took them somewhere." she replies. I think her name was Alice, "He said something about lunch."

I stayed close to the wall by the entrance to the dinner hall. I should've learnt lesson about eavesdropping, but this is something I need to know. I didn't dare peek my head around the corner; they would probably spot me. They must've been sitting far away as I could only just make out what they were saying.

"We just think that it's unfair," explains Shannon.

"Can we go? We have a party to get ready for." says Brooke sounding bored.

"No." says Tobias, mocking her voice, "look, Lexi's score will have nothing to do with us being related. Okay?"

"Fine." says Megan

"Oh, and does anyone know where I can find Tyler, he's wasn't in the dorm when I looked?" adds Tobias.

"He'll be wherever Lexi is, they're a sort of a couple now." explains Tasha

A voice comes up from behind and startles me. It was Tyler.

"Hey you gonna have lunch?" he asks

"No I think I'm gonna stand out here and starve myself, that seems like a fun thing to do," I say. We laugh and he takes my hand as we walk into the dinner hall. In that moment, I had completely forgotten that Tobias was in there with Megan and the others. I came to a complete standstill. Tyler stood a little bit in front of me, almost protectively. Tobias comes forward then and says, "So you are the boy dating my sister." It wasn't a question, but it was delivered that way.

"Yes, Four," was all Tyler responded with. Most initiates are scared of Tobias and Tris. Megan, Tasha and Brooke are the only ones who look at me as they pass to find a table for lunch, their expressions apologetic. If Olivia and Shannon glance at me, they do it quickly, before I can notice. Tobias and Tyler shake hands and we walk off to get some food. They were serving some weird shaped food. It was an orangey-brown on the outside with a bone sticking out one end. I looked at Tyler next to me and whispered, "What is it?"

"I have no idea," was all he responded with. Useful!

"It's a chicken drumstick," Tobias explains. Chicken, as in the animal? Either way, I was going to eat it. Food is food, if it's edible, even better.

Tobias walks over to a table slowly filling up with other instructors. Me and Tyler walk over, hand in hand, to his friends in the corner. When they see us approaching, some of them smirk at Tyler, the others smile kindly at me.

"Guys, this is my . . . girlfriend Lexi," Tyler says to the others. I smiled at him when he said the word girlfriend. It was nice to hear that name; I'd never been anyone's girlfriend. "Lexi, this is George, Alfie, Olly, Shane and Michael." I wave at all of them and say 'hey'. They make room for us on the left hand side of the table. I wish we were sitting on the right because right now, whenever I lift my head up, I'll end up looking at Megan. If we were sitting on the right, my back would be to them and I wouldn't even be tempted to look at them.

After ten minutes, my plate was clear and I'd had seconds . . . twice. I hate to say this, but chicken is actually delicious. It was nice and juicy on the inside and crisp on the outside. I tried to eat it like a proper girl, but the bones were really irritating so in the end, I just picked it up and ate it off the bone. I don't care what anyone thinks.

"What are you guys going to do today?" I ask Tyler and his friends.

"Get ready for the party tonight. Look," Tyler points over to the instructors' table, "The dude on the far right is Uriah and the woman next to him is Christina." he explains. They looked pretty cool, hopefully they are.

"I wanna get a tattoo!" says Shane.

"I already beat you all to the mark!" I say laughing.

"Wait you've got a tattoo?" asks Shane, shocked.

"Yeah about an hour ago."

"What is it?" asks Tyler. I move my shirt to reveal the collarbone and the ink engraved on it.

"'And we gonna let it burn'. I just got it 'cause those lyrics stuck with me, it reminds me of the dauntless logo and it sounds really sassy." I explain.

"I love it and I love you." says Tyler, wrapping his arm around me and kissing my cheek. Someone, Shane, makes a gagging noise so I give him the finger.

When lunch is over, Tyler goes with his friends as they want to get tattoos and I go back to the dorm to dye my hair for tonight.

Dying your hair is tough on your own. You have to make sure not to get it on any clothes or on your skin or on the floor; it stains. The most annoying thing about it though is the fact that you have to have a shower beforehand, so your hair is soaking wet and it easily drips everywhere. I tied my hair up in a bun on the top of my head to keep it from falling all over the place. I found a hair dryer plugged into the wall. It was all black and had orange flames all over it. Of course. I must've stood there, looking in the mirror, holding the hair dryer really close to my head, hoping it would dry the hair quicker, for about ten minutes. My hair was finally dry and I pulled out the final bobby pin to let my hair fall free. It was only a small change, but I looked completely different. My dark hair contrasted with my pale face perfectly. It also brought out my eyes more. Now I have to wash the excess out! Fun! I repeated this for the red dye.

I finally finished my hair an hour later! It did look amazing though. Like a proper Dauntless. I walked out of the bathroom and into the dorm to find the clothes that Tobias gave me this morning. I changed quickly then walked over to the shop to get some cool clothes for tonight. I let my hair fall loose today; when it's wet, it doesn't flick out, it just becomes wavy. It felt nice to have the wind in my hair. I was never allowed to have my hair down in Abnegation, so today felt amazing. Every Dauntless initiate is given a certain amount of points to spend every month, like getting payed for doing a job. When I reached the shop, I heard Olivia's voice and, what I think was, Megan's voice, so I hid behind a rack of clothes. 'You have to stop eavesdropping!' I told myself. I walked in the away from Megan and Livvie; I didn't want to know what they were talking about.

I had two things in mind to get today: A dress for tonight and some extra fighting clothes for initiation. The fighting clothes were easy to find; they were right by the entrance. The dress was harder to find though. I doubt a lot of people walk in to this shop and say that they want a dress. I finally located a small rack of dresses towards the back of the shop, but there were only three colours that I could see: red, orange and black. True Dauntless colours. Orange was definitely out, so it's between red and black. I like the shape of the red one more. I has one strap that wraps around my neck and leaves my back bare. The main dress is short and falls halfway down my thighs but it carries on thinly, almost see through, down to my ankles. but I prefer the colour black; It would also go better with my hair. I walk up to the till and ask, "Do you have this dress in black?"

"Yes, we do. Let me go and get it." she replies, smiling.

When she returns, she hands me the dress so I can make sure that it's the right size. I nod at her and she scans the barcode. This month the initiates have received two hundred points to spend on clothes, any extra food we may want, washing, stuff like that. The dress costs forty points, so I'm down to one hundred and sixty.

I take a nice, easy stroll through the pit on my way back to the dorms today. It's about three o'clock so I have six hours to kill before the party. When I walk through the door to the dormitory, Megan, Livvie, Brooke, Tasha and Shannon were all sitting in a circle facing me.

"Hey guys," I say. When they don't respond, I add, "what's up?" An awkward silence fills the air as they look at each other, avoiding eye contact with me. Then they all erupt. Choruses of "We're so sorry!" fills the room as millions of arms wrap around me.

Tasha shouts, "GROUP HUG!" at the top of her voice.

"What are you wearing tonight?" asks Brooke. Always thinking of fashion!

"Don't worry! I just bought a dress." I say, trying to calm her down. Everyone wanted to see my dress for some reason. The others all bought theirs earlier, so we agreed to all take them out at the same time.

Megan had a light blue dress that puffed out a little bit with a gems circling around the waist and it didn't have and shoulder straps. Brooke's was Red and short with two black stripes, one on each side, going from her shoulders, down her side to the bottom. Tasha's was dark purple and had one shoulder strap with beads going around the neck and waist. It also puffs out at the hips and falls just above her knees. Shannon's was by far the prettiest, in my opinion. It has two shoulder straps which are cream like the top half of the dress. The bottom half is a deep blue and falls loosely down to her knees. Livvie's was orange and falls down to her ankles. It has ripples through it and has no shoulder straps.

Everybody loved everyone elses dresses. We would fascinate over Brooke's dress then move on to Shannon and then on to Megan and so on. We sat in the dorms chatting for about five hours. We were all distracted in our own little worlds, so when Brooke shouts "Wait!" we all jump out of our skins.

"What?" says Tasha, trying to get her breath back.

"Did you guys buy any make up earlier?" asks Brooke.

"No."

"Well don't you all love me now!" she says as she whacks out a massive make up pack. We all agreed that Brooke would be the best at applying it so we took it in turn sitting in front of her whilst she made us look prettier. It was about an hour until the party now and Megan was stressing over her hair. She had never had to look different in Abnegation. Here she has to, if she wants to be noticed. Megan had her make up done first so all she had to do was fix her hair and she'd be ready. I was having my makeup done last so I could do my hair before hand. I couldn't think of what to do so I used Tasha's hair curler that she brought earlier. I asked to go last because my hair takes ages to mould and shape, so if I curl it an hour before the party, it will have time to set.

Brooke did the makeup really quickly so when it was my turn, I was shocked. I had only just finished my hair.

"No matter what you do, I won't be pretty." I say.

"You have no idea what I can do!" she says, smiling. I close my eyes and wait for time to pass. I like the feel of the eye liner and the blusher brush as they brush across my face.

"Done!"" shouts Brooke. I give her a hug and run into the bathroom to look at my reflection. The person in the mirror is not the Lexi Eaton I have always known. She is different. This girl is shockingly pretty. This girl could turn a million heads if she wanted to. This girl looked strong, confident. This girl was me.

Getting my dress on was hard after that; I didn't want to smudge my make up or ruin my hair. Once it was on, I waited for everyone else to get ready. Brooke was done first, then Tasha, Livvie, Megan and Shannon. Everyone looked amazing. Shannon look so pretty, the dress complimented her eyes loads. The eyeliner Brooke applied on her made her eyes stand out even more and she looked beautiful. Megan straightened her hair with the straighteners she brought earlier with Tash, and she looked amazing with straight hair. Livvie tried to straighten her hair ny the look of it, but her hair is quite frizzy so it only died it down a little bit. But that made it look like she had waves in her hair and it looked perfect on her. Tash, put her hair up in a bun. It looked amazing because the rest of her hair was all chocolate brown, apart from the actual bun which was hot pink from the dip dye. Brooke curled her hair like me but hers suited her more. The ringlets fell down her back and fitted her face perfectly. I wouldn't be surprised if Tyler left me to date these guys.

"You guys ready?" asks Livvie.

"Let's rock this party." I reply as I walk out of the room with the others on my heels.


	4. Chapter 4

**Guys, I'm SOOOO sorry it's been ages! I've had so much of crap in my life that I've had to deal with but I promise to be here much more xxx love you guys loads! - Elis xx**

As we walk through the doors to Christina's room, all heads turn in our direction. I turn to Olivia, who is on my right flank, and whisper, "That's how you make an appearance!" she replied with a smile and elbowed my ribs. She's becoming more confident now, more relaxed. She is no longer the quiet Erudite I had previously known. Christina's room is giant. It is at least twice the size of our dorm. It has multi-coloured walls as well. The colours range from black to white (was she originally Candor?) red to green and turquoise to hot pink. On the back wall, something is written. I can just about make out what it says: "R.I.P Will" with a big heart around it. Was Will someone she dated? A family member? It would be too rude to ask her, plus it might bring up some painful memories.

Every initiate, Dauntless born and not, is already there and they all look amazing. Alice, a Dauntless born initiate we are close to, wears a beautiful short green dress that carries on thinly on her right side. It was stunning. About a minute after we enter the room, Tyler comes to my side and takes me away to the punch bowl. I wave goodbye to my friends as they also separate into groups.

"Glad you came," says Tyler as he pecks me on the lips.

"You doubted?" I ask, jokingly.

"Never." was all he replies with. He kisses me again, but this time, it's hard and lasts longer than the one before. When we break apart, we smile at each other for ages, giggling now and then. Tyler takes my hand and leads me off onto the dancefloor as music starts blasting out of big, black boxes. I had no idea what they were but they amplify the sound of the music so I'll just call them 'amps' or 'flyers' or something like that. Me and Tyler swirl on the dancefloor in an embrace. It wasn't till Tobias called my name that I remembered we weren't in a world of our own. Man I hated his timing SO much!

"Excuse me," I whisper to Tyler, "I won't be long." I walk over to Tobias and he leads me to the corner of the room. There's no one near us over here, so whatever he wants to tell me, it must be quite private.

"What do you want Tobias?" I ask, sighing. He is wearing dark blue jeans, a black suit jacket and a plain white, collared shirt. It's a weird combination but it suits him really well.

"Calm down!" he says laughing, but then seriously, "Look, I'd just be careful around Tyler. Before you arrived, I overheard him talking to his friends about using someone. I don't want that someone to be you, okay?"

"I'll be fine, Tyler wouldn't do that." I say as I walk back to him and his group of friends.

"What was that about?" asks Tyler, wrapping his arm around me.

"Nothing." I reply smiling at him.

The night is starting to come to a close now as initiates are leaving to go back to the dorms and get ready for tomorrow. Out of my group, Me and Olivia are the only ones left. All the instructors are still here and are drinking lots of alcohol! It is nice to see my brother drunk; it's quite funny. Tyler and his friends are also drinking quite a lot. Young people and alcohol. Not the best combination I've ever heard of.

I break away from Livvie and walk over to Tyler to take the eighth bottle of beer out of his hands.

"Dude!" he replies slowly.

"'Dude!' yourself! We have initiation tomorrow and I don't want you to pass out during the middle of it. It will lower your score." I say moving the bottle away from him.

"I'm gonna do fine 'cause I'm dating you!" he says, slurring all his words.

"What?" I ask, pulling away from him.

"Well, if I date an instructors relative, it will boost my score, like it will yours." he says laughing.

"You're dating me because I'm related to Tob- Four?" he nods, "You bastard! I thought you actually liked me! God I'm an idiot! Screw you Tyler, rot in hell." I shout, running out of the party with tears streaming down my face.

"Lexi!" calls Tobias. Man he was fast. Maybe that's where I got my speed from.

"Go away!" I scream back, turning sharply at every corner, trying to lose him. I quickly take a glance over my shoulder to see how close he is. He is no longer behind me. Where did he go? Just then, I bash into something hard but warm. It was him.

"How did you do that?" I ask confused.

"I've been here for a while; I know all the tricks here." he says. He looked at my face then and smiled sympathetically. "Come here." he says quietly as he draws me into a hug, resting his chin on my head. I can't help it; a tsunami of tears overflows my eyes and they stream down my face rapidly.

"I feel so stupid!" I whisper, holding him tighter, "Plus, now everyone knows that me and you are related."

"If it helps, nearly all of the initiates had already left. It was just Tyler, two of his friends, you and Olivia. It will all be alright."

"Yeah, but they'll tell everyone." I say, pulling away from him to wipe my eyes.

"If anyone says one mean thing to you, I'll put them in the hospital." he says. The sentence itself is serious, but the way he delivers it makes me laugh.

"Thank you," I say, "I'm gonna go get some rest for tomorrow, Bye." I hug him quickly and walk towards the dorms. I don't want to face anyone at the moment but I know my friends will be there for me.

As I walk through the doors, I receive a few evil glances, but the rest are all friendly. At least some people were civil. It's about eleven thirty and Megan and the rest are all in bed, sleeping. I clamber into bed and before my head has even hit the pillow, I'm already asleep.

I wake to the sound of a whistle that seems to be right next to me. I open my eyes to see Eric moving from bed to bed, blowing a whistle in everyone's face. God, I hate him! Livvie screams bloody murder as Eric blows in her ears and rolls out of the top bunk on to the floor. As she falls, she grabs on to Tasha's hair and yanks out loads of it! It's so funny!

"You alright there Tash?" says Megan, laughing. Tash is about to respond but Eric shouts before she can.

"Initiates. . . GET UP!" he screams at the top of his voice. "Today, you will be split into two groups. The first group will go with me and I will teach you about combat. The second group will go with Four and he will teach you about knife throwing or something like that," I take a glance at Tobias and he looks quite annoyed. Probably at the way Eric treats him like trash. I've noticed this recently. Eric treats Four like trash and he seems to take it lightly.

Eric splits us into two and me, Megan, Livvie and Tasha are all in the same group. I think of Megan and Livvie as my best friends. At the moment anyway. There is about twelve of us in this group and most of them are Dauntless born. I think that it's slightly unfair that they put transfers against Dauntless born initiates but oh well, nothing I can really do about that. We're with Eric today. How fun! I don't think the day can actually get worse until I realise that Tyler is also in our group. Eric leads us to a stop beside a big, padded square. It must be what we fight on.

"Okay, so today you will be learning how to fight with me. We will have training all day, with breaks for lunch, then, at four o'clock we will go to the fights. After that, you will go to dinner and tomorrow you will swap with Four's group and learn whatever he's teaching them." Eric leads us through the simple strategies of a basic left stance to keep ourselves well protected. We all try punching and kicking on the pads and when the bell rings, Eric shouts at the top of his voice: "The list of who is fighting who is now up come over and see this." _Please be Tyler, please be Tyler _I keep whispering to myself as I walk over to the chalkboard with Megan. This is the list:

ROUND ONE

1) Ethan .v. Alex

2) Lewis .v. Matt

3) Lexi .v. Tasha

4) Elis .v. Phoebe

5) Tyler .v. Jason

6) Megan .v. Livvie

At least he put girls against girls and boys against boys . . . for now anyway.

ROUND TWO

1) Alex .v. Elis

2) Matt .v. Tasha

3) Phoebe .v. Tasha

4) Meg .v. Jason

5) Lexi .v. Ethan

6) Livvie .v. Lewis

ROUND THREE

1) Alex v Tyler

2) ELis v Meg

3) Ethan v Phoebe

4) Jason v Matt

5) Lewis v Tasha

6) Lexi v Livvie

ROUND FOUR

1) Lexi v Tyler

2) Elis v Matt

3) Ethan v Lewis

4) Meg v Phoebe

5) Jason v Livvie

6) Alex v Tasha

It wasn't too bad, I guess. At least I get to destroy Tyler in our match. The main tactic is to not get too injured before my last fight. That way, I'll be able to put up a good fight. I just don't want to fight Tasha, unfortunately, I don't have a say in that though. I hope Megan and Livvie do well in their fights.

"Now that you've all had time to take in the shock of who you are fighting, get training." says Eric, commandingly.

The rest of the day passed in a blur. I spend five hours before lunch on the punchbags building up some more muscle. It's harder that it sounds. Lunch also flies by. All I remember is sitting with Megan and Livvie then rushing back to the training room with half an hour still left of my lunch break. After lunch I work on stamina fitness. I do one hundred and fifty laps of the training room which takes and hour and a half. By the time I've finished the laps, it's three o'clock. Damn it! I only have one hour left. It's ten minutes per match and mine is the third one in round one so I have a bit more time to prepare. I didn't want to fight Tasha, she's my friend but I have to.

Alex and Ethan's match went on for the whole ten minutes. According to Eric, most matches don't last past five or six. Alex comes out the victor but only just. If it wasn't for his one sloppy punch that looked like it was going to the chest but ended up slamming into his stomach, Ethan would've won. Lewis and Matt's match is over quickly, annoyingly. Matt takes three hooks to the face and collapses like a fish on the floor. He is taken off like Ethan into the nurse's office by Four. He returns in time to see me fight Tasha. We enter the ring and stand there looking at each other, waiting for Eric to blow the whistle. I take a quick glance at Tobias before the whistle blow sand I see him discreetly give an okay symbol with his hands. Me and Tasha circle around each other for a while until Eric shouts: "Boring! Somebody do something!" I give him the finger and carry on fighting. But while my attention is divided, Tasha lunges at me, her palm ready to slap my face. I duck in time for her to avoid hitting my face, but as she comes down, she whacks my head and I see spots in my vision. I see Tobias slowly edging towards the ring but he comes to a halt when he sees me getting up. I lunge back at Tasha, grab her foot and twist her ankle with as much as force as I can. She screams out with pain and collapses to the floor. Tasha doesn't get back up so I look over to Eric and say: "Was that goring?"

"I wouldn't say boring, but it wasn't the most entertaining thing to watch," he says, "besides, you haven't won yet."

"How have I not won?" I ask, "She's unable to stand back up."  
"Congratulations initiate, you can see. What I meant was that she isn't unconscious, so you haven't won . . . yet anyway."

I look over to Four, hoping he'll be able to help me, but all he does is shrug his shoulders and mouth 'sorry'. Damn it! I need to win this match if I want to assure a place in the top ten, but there's no point if I loose all my friends along the way is there? Tasha looks up at me then and whispers, "Do it. I'll be alright, they'll take me to the hospital thing and I'll be back in no time."

"Are you sure?" I ask, worried about what might happen to my friend.

"One hundred percent." She says as she points to the side of her face where the cheekbone is. I take a long, deep breath and bring my leg and as I do, I whisper quiet enough that the others can't hear, but loud enough that Tasha can hear, "Fake it." At that moment, she closes her eyes and a tiny smile creeps on to her face.

I pretend to kick her hard, and she reacts well. If she hadn't chosen Dauntless, I'm sure she would've become an awesome actress in the tv programmes they film at the Amity compound. When she is 'unconscious' I step out of the ring and stare at Eric. He shouts, "Winner: Lexi. Congrats little one, you're not much like your brother are you? You see, he has a caring heart, you, on the other hand, are hollow. Just like me." I was scared I might vomit. I am _nothing _like Eric. I am like Tobias; I have a heart. I look over to Tobias, hoping he'll comfort me, but as our eyes connect, he frowns, shakes his head and turns away from me. Did he think that I would actually kick my friend? Does everybody think that I'm like Eric, a soulless monster? I check to see if anyone is looking but they're all focused on the next match which is between Elis and Phoebe. I've seen Elis and Phoebe in training and I know, without a doubt, that Elis is going to win effortlessly. Thank god I don't have to fight her.I look away from the fight and go to find Tobias who should be at the medical centre, looking after the injured initiates.

I walk in to see him sitting next to Tasha's bed, looking at, what looks like, her medical form. Tasha must be sleeping because she looks like she really is unconscious. He hears me come in and says harshly, "Why did you do that?"

"I-" I begin to explain but he cuts me off before I can get a second syllable out.

"I don't want to hear your crappy excuses like 'Eric would've thought I was weak'" he says, mimicking my voice, "or how about 'I might of gotten kicked out!' You're just as bad as him!"

Pain suddenly overflows my body but is replaced by anger just as quickly.

"How dare you." I shout, "How dare you judge me! I am nothing like Eric and I never will be! You don't know what I was feeling out there, what was going through my head! You have no right to judge me! I may be as bad as Eric, but you're worse than father!" Out of nowhere, he slaps me right across the face. I collapse on to the floor, seeing stars fly across my vision.

"Oh my God! Lexi stay with me!" he says desperately. "You fall asleep now, it could be days until you're awake." He disappears from my vision for a minute but then reappears with what looked like an ice pack. I expect him to put it on my cheek but instead he places it under my head, on the painful throbbing that has just occurred.

"Keep it there for a few minutes and then I'll help you stand up," he says, "God Lexi, I'm so sorry. I don't know what happened to me; I never lose control that easily."

I couldn't focus on anything he was saying because the pain came back then, but this time, it was much more sharper. I scream out in pain and the look on Tobias' face becomes even more worried. It feels like there is a hammer inside of my head trying to smash it's way out. I go to feel where the pain is coming from, but Tobias places my hand back down and simply stares at the top of my head.

"What's wrong?" I ask, whispering.

"Where does it hurt the most on your head?" he asks, sternly.

"The top of my head, why?" he was starting to make me confused now. What was on the top of my head? What was causing all this pain?

"You're bleeding. Lots." is all he says. So what if I'm bleeding? This is Dauntless for god's sake! People get shot here all the time and they're perfectly fine! What was wrong with me bleeding?

I might not have thought it was a big deal then, but now, I start to feel myself falling under. I see Four running around the place, looking for something clearly. As every second goes by, I feel myself falling deeper and deeper. One of the last things I see is Tobias screaming something at me, water filling his eyes. But I'm too far gone to hear anything. Why was he getting so upset? I know I'll come back and he should know that too. Afterall, I'm Lexi Eaton and I'm a survivor.

White light blinds my eyes as they flutter open. I am in a single room that has one window that looks into another room, that one is bigger and is filled with people all in white. Are they doctors? I hear distant voices around me but one stands out more than the others. I know that voice, but who's is it? A man comes into the room but I don't recognise him. Who is this guy? He wears all black clothes, Dauntless clearly, has short hair and he has a tattoo peeking out from under his shirt. He has dark brown hair to match the colour of his eyes and he is very tall and well built.

"Hey Lexi, how are you?" the stranger asks. When I look at him blankly, he continues, "Lex, it's me, it's Tobias." his voice starts to sound pleading.

"Tobias?" I ask. He nods, looking worried now. "I'm . . . I'm sorry but . . . but I have no idea who you are."

A tsunami of pain overwhelms him and he has to take a step back to steady himself.

"You . . . you don't know who . . . who I am?" he asks, astonished.

"That would be correct." Came a totally different voice. I man in white walked up to us then, holding a clipboard full of paper.

"Huh?" asks Tobias. I think that's his name; I can't remember what it is. It begins with T and that's the only thing I definitely know.

"Alexia has suffered a serious head injury. She is suffering from a Cerebral Hemorrhage which, in other words, is basically bleeding on the brain. This has caused her to forget people. She remembers the basic things like the factions and what she chose and all that has happened in her life. She just can't remember people."

"Will she ever remember?" Tobias asks, whispering.

"Oh definitely!" says the doctor and as he does, Tobias lets a heavy sigh of relief out, "All you have to do is jog her memory but it should be easy as she will remember most people just by hearing their voice."

"But she hasn't remembered me and I'm her brother." he explains. My brother? I have a brother? Oh my god, I thought my brother was hot! Kill me now!

"Then you'll have to dig deeper. Have a good day." and with that, he left.

"Come on," he says as he picks me up out of the bed and sets me on my feet, "We're going."

"Where?" I ask curiously.

"Home." he says simply. "You'll hate it!" he adds, whispering.

I had no idea where I was going but with a guy like Tobias next to me the whole way, I felt pretty safe.


End file.
